What is professional counselling all about?

Am I crazy if I go to counselling? Will talking to a counsellor really help me? What if people think I’m weak just because I go to counselling? These were some of the thoughts I had when I first began my mental health journey. Nevertheless, it was counselling that helped me get back on my feet, and I do not regret seeking help when I needed it.

Let’s start with the basics: what is counselling? Counselling involves professional relationships designed to help individuals, families, and groups achieve mental health, wellness, educational, and career goals (Kaplan et al., 2014). In simple terms, you talk to a licensed professional who listens attentively, offers guidance, and helps you discover effective ways to cope with your concerns.

However, talking to a counsellor is very different from talking to a friend. While friends are amazing support systems, counselling offers something more structured and objective. A counsellor listens without judgment, provides professional insight, and uses evidence-based techniques to support your growth. In my personal experience, friends tend to take your side no matter what, but a therapist will professionally challenge your perspectives and help you identify maladaptive patterns - so you can grow, become a better person, and live a healthier life.

It is also important to understand that counsellors usually don’t give direct advice. I used to hope my counsellor would hand me a guidebook to life so I could fix everything immediately. Unfortunately (or maybe fortunately), that’s not how counselling works. There is no one-size-fits-all solution. Instead of telling you what to do, a counsellor helps you explore options and develop coping strategies that are tailored to your needs and circumstances. This process builds resilience, allowing you to manage future challenges using skills that truly work for you.

Because of this, counselling does not “fix” everything in just one or two sessions. It takes time to explore your experiences and learn coping mechanisms that will stay with you long-term. Personally, I have been in counselling for years, and I still gain something new from every session.

Now that we’ve talked about what counselling is like, let’s discuss when someone should go for counselling. Contrary to popular belief, counselling is not only for people with severe or “serious” problems. Anyone facing difficulties can benefit from counselling. Generally, you may want to seek counselling if you experience persistent sadness or hopelessness, feel overwhelmed by challenges, rely on unhealthy coping mechanisms, notice changes in appetite, sleep, or energy levels, or struggle with concentration and decision-making.

It is especially helpful to go for counselling early, before problems become overwhelming. The earlier you seek help, the easier it often is to work through issues. In my case, I struggled with my mental health for eight years before finally getting help. By the time I started counselling, there were multiple overlapping issues that could have benefited from early intervention. For example, maladaptive coping mechanisms had already become ingrained in my daily life, making them much harder to unlearn. That said, it is never too late to start counselling - late is always better than never. After years of counselling, I am finally regaining control of my life.

Another common myth is that all counselling is the same, but that couldn’t be further from the truth. There are many different counselling approaches, and it’s important to check a counsellor’s specialisation before choosing one. Some common approaches include:

• Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT): focuses on identifying and changing negative thought patterns

• Person-Centered Therapy (PCT): a non-directive approach that emphasises empathy and unconditional support

• Solution-Focused Therapy (SFT): focuses on practical solutions to immediate concerns

• Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT): encourages mindfulness and value-driven action

• Gestalt Therapy: emphasises personal responsibility and present-moment awareness

• Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing (EMDR): a structured therapy designed to reduce distress related to traumatic memories

  
  

When deciding which approach is right for you, it helps to consider your specific goals and challenges, such as anxiety, depression, trauma, or relationship issues. You can also speak directly with potential therapists about their approach and see whether it aligns with your needs. This can greatly increase the chances of finding a therapist who is a good fit for you.

Personally, I benefit much more from EMDR than CBT. I tend to intellectualise my emotions instead of fully processing them, and EMDR helps me break through maladaptive coping mechanisms linked to traumatic memories. To be honest, it may take a few tries before you find the approach or therapist that suits you best - but trying is always worth it. Counsellors are also ethically and legally bound to follow professional guidelines to ensure clients are not harmed.

You are not weak for choosing counselling. In fact, making that choice takes immense strength and determination - it is a powerful sign of resilience on your mental health journey.

For further inquiries about counselling, feel free to reach out to any of our counsellors / clinical hypnotherapists here to arrange a consultation!

Reference:

Kaplan, D. M., Tarvydas, V. M., & Gladding, S. T. (2014). 20/20: A vision for the future of counseling: The new consensus definition of counseling. Journal of Counseling & Development, 92(3), 366–372. https://doi.org/10.1002/j.1556-6676.2014.00164.x

Blog written by Sue Pei, a passionate student in Psychology and a firm believer in therapy.